The Road I've Taken

If u feel lost and far from home..

The only way to regain your strength is to return, though for awhile...

That's what i did since in medical school, can't believe i'm doing it again now after 2 years working as a doctor. But i'm happy to be at home again, even for few hours - to see the familiar and beloved faces, sleep on my bed, eat home food, shopping in your hometown areas. I suppose the familiarity and comforts i've gained here made me so homesick whenever i'm away from home. But i've got to sacrifice this luxury if i wanna so much to be an anaesthetist... I need to train myself to be independent and build my self esteem in new place, maybe i can focus more as being away from home. Sometimes when i'm in my low spirit, i thought of quit and left this medical profession. But after refreshing my memory in Golan Height 2 years back in Syria from a documentary in television this morning, i know that i'm on the right track. I need to continue this journey of mine to become a beneficial and competent relief worker for the suffering ummah, no matter where they are, that's my purpose of becoming a doctor in da first place. May Allah grant me with patient and persistence...ameen

Housemanship possible

1. Obstetric and Gynaecology

Started working with scream and crying
Not seeing sunlight for 10 days tagging really depressing
But got some spirit in labour room by DrV's charming

2. Paediatric

Again working with cry but with kids, got to laugh and smile
Really had tough times with DrB in most unwanted KK
Build some stamina by being in longest grand round ever

3. Orthopaedic

Enjoying my moments of leisure as housemanship
Collecting 'mangkuks' from MsA
But thanks to MrAs, having good time in OrthoPaed

4. Medicine

Learned to be independent and voice out my own opinion
Got some issues with DrS in most unwanted ward again
Being scolded and humiliated by DrS but being appreciated by DrJ

5. Anaesthesia

Working under guidance of seniors
Learning to become patient, waiting for the surgeons
Regain some weight that I've lost in medical

6. Surgical

All I can say that everyone is working in fear
The pressure is too much towards the end
But thanks to MrG for making it a happy ending for me :)

O Allah, thank You, for giving me the strength to hold on,
And now I'm FREEDOM...

So just keep holding on...Housemanship possible!

Thank You Allah, I'm blessed

It has been almost more than one year since my last entry in this blog. Maybe I was too preoccupied with my housemanship. That doesn't mean I was working endlessly but I can't deny that I've changed thruout the years, hopefully into a better doctor insyaAllah... I've decided to talk on each posting separately at the end of my housemanship later aite.


After the ups and down I faced in this life, I am gratefully thank to The Almighty for all the blessings he gave me. Maybe I ain't got all the things that I want but I'm happy to always be in acceptance and 'redha'.

There's one new song by Whitney Houston that I like to share, very inspiring and motivating. Really love the phrase "I was not built to break". Hope I'll survive this housemanship till end successfully....
Didn't Know My Own Strength 
song by Whitney Houston

Lost touch with my soul

I had no where to turn

I had no where to go

Lost sight of my dream,

Thought it would be the end of me

I thought I'd never make it through

I had no hope to hold on to

I thought I would break

I didn't know my own strength

And I crashed down, and I tumbled

But I did not crumble

I got through all the pain

I didn't know my own strength

Survived my darkest hour

My faith kept me alive

I picked myself back up

Hold my head up high

I was not built to break

I didn't know my own strength oh

Found hope in my heart,

I found the light to life

My way out of the dark

Found all that I need

Here inside of me oh

I thought I'd never find my way

I thought I'd never lift that weight

I thought I would break

I didn't know my own strength

And I crashed down, and I tumbled

But I did not crumble

I got through all the pain

I didn't know my own strength

Survived my darkest hour

My faith kept me alive

I picked myself back up

Hold my head up high

I was not built to break

I didn't know my own strength

There were so many times I

Wondered how I'd get through the night I

Thought I took all that I could take

I didn't know my own strength

And I crashed down, and I tumbled

But I did not crumble

I got through all the pain oh

I didn't know my own strength

Survived my darkest hour

My faith kept me alive

I picked myself back up

I Hold my head up high

I was not built to break

I didn't know my own strength

I was not built to break

NO NO

I got to know my own strength.